getting answers …

there are very few photos from this weekend, so i’m replacing the normal monday post with something that’s been on my heart for several weeks and finally came to a screeching halt last night and this morning.

Casey has been showing signs of sickness for a few weeks now. being the stubborn man that is my husband, he’s been chalking it up to tired and overworked. and because i refused to accept the fact that something may be wrong with him, i went along.

i convinced him to go to the doctor this past wednesday. it was the normal poke, prod, give blood for tests, and be sent home. i was furious. am i the only one in the world that can clearly tell there is something wrong with my husband? the doctor’s office called on friday and told him his bloodwork was clear, come back on the 15th for follow-up.

by sunday night, we were in the emergency room. he started feeling badly after lunch and felt like taking a nap. we just so happened to be visiting my parents for my birthday and she decided we should check his blood sugar, to see if that might be why he was feeling bad.

it was over 600. so high that her reader wouldn’t pick up the actual number.

three bottles of water and a few pickles later (old wives tales are often fairly accurate), the reading was still (literally) off the charts. and we made our way to the emergency room.

on a very rare occassion, i’m sure, we were taken directly back to a cubicle where they confirmed that his sugar was indeed 671.

671?!?!

a normal blood sugar level should never exceed 140. 200-300 is considered high.

his was ALMOST 700.

four hours, two bags of iv fluid, and 10ccs of insulin later, his blood sugar dropped by over half and we were sent home with an almost diagnosis and a lot of questions. i was torn between fury and fear. how could have the wednesday doctor have not noticed something so obviously wrong?

he returned to the doctor this morning and this time, he wasn’t leaving without answers.

and now we have them.

type 1 diabetes.

essentially, his pancreas has quit producing the insulin his body needs to process sugar.

he’ll have to regulate his diet, take insulin shots, and generally change everything about his eating habits.

it’s going to be a long, hard road to get this under control. but once it is, he can lead a healthy, moderately normal life.

and, is it awful and callous of me to say that in a way i’m relieved? because i am.

i’m relieved that by the grace of God, there is no terrible underlying cause and no apparent damage caused by weeks or months of crazy high blood sugar levels. i’m relieved because this is something we can control. i’m relieved that after weeks of fear and questions, we have our answers. i’m relieved that with the help of the doctors, we can educate ourselves on diabetes and learn how to treat his situation.

i’m relieved because once again, God has answered my cry and let me keep my husband.

we will get through this.